February 17, 2012

My Impression Of A Movie Reviewer Slowly Going Insane

Let’s just say that Safe House isn’t exactly going to save Mr. Reynolds’ acting career.

A safe choice for Mr. Reynolds, but he doesn’t exactly take it to the house.

wait

bring the house down is better.

Safe to say, Ryan Reynolds doesn’t bring the house down. In Safe House.

In the movie Safe House, actor Ryan Reynolds saves the day but he can’t save a hackneyed old concept from boring the audience. House.

Safe House is a safe bet for a night at the movies, but ultimately there’s no one home.

No one is safe. OK, no.

If you want a night out of the house, you’re safe with Safe House, but you’d be better off saving your money and getting housed instead.

No. Christ.

Um.

House it going? Jesus. Fuck. FUCK.

-Inspired by @McCarrick

One Response to “My Impression Of A Movie Reviewer Slowly Going Insane”

  1. Reviewer says:

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Once the executive branch of a thriving government, I am now a lonely wanderer, floating rudderless on a sea of discontent. Or a swamp. A swamp of malaise. A slough of despair, bitches. Rudderless.